Puppy Love
by The Countess of Monte Cristo
Summary: When Remus realizes the truth about Tonks' feelings for him, a certain friend gives some much needed advise.


_A/N So now my fangirl obsession is...you guessed it Harry Potter. I spent all of Labor Day weekend marathoning the movies and am currently rereading the books. So naturally, I decided to try my hand at this vast fandom. Here's my first crack at it. As always, I appreciate everyone who takes the time to read this, and reviews are always a wonderful gift!_

* * *

It was a dreary, damp evening when even the stars refused to shine, and the bashful moon hid behind a gown of clouds. A bitter wind tore at the Order members' jackets as they huddled in the bushes under the cloud-darkened sky. The night air was crisp and chilled, and Remus's patched and shabby outerwear did little to stave off the cold. The full moon was still several nights off, yet he could feel the dull ache that accompanied that coming night. It was usually like this on scouting missions: cold, uneventful, generally unpleasant, and almost always taking place far too close to the full moon for comfort. But that was war, Remus supposed. War was no respecter of weather or one's personal ills.

However, as far as he was concerned, this was a rather pleasant evening despite it all. It wasn't that he was overly fond of winter's cutting chill, spying on Death Eaters, or hiding in shrubbery (Merlin knows he'd enough of the last at Hogwarts. It really was astounding what James and Sirius were able to convince him to do). Quite the contrary, if pressed, he would have to say it was the company that made this endeavor worthwhile.

In the short time that he'd known her, the impish witch Tonks had certainly bewitched him with her many charms. She was clever, young, and vibrant (in appearance as well as personality), and an overall joy to be around. Her exuberance and carefree nature reminded Remus of a happier time, a time of friendship and loyalty, of adventure and excitement, despite the current danger the whole of the wizarding community currently faced. And…Remus was almost embarrassed to admit, even to himself, like most of the Black linage, she was blessed with stunning good looks. Although, just how much of her looks she was born with was hard to say as her being a Metamorphamagus made it so that her appearance was as unpredictable as her mood (another Black trait to be sure, he thought with a silent chuckle as he remembered a certain dour mood he had left one Sirius Black in earlier that evening).

However, all the pleasant company in the world could not stave off the dull creeping of boredom. Watching Dolohov's house in the hopes of gleaning some insight into the Death Eater's, and by extension Voldemort's, movements was proving less than fruitful. With a sigh, he decided to chase away his ennui with some idle chatter.

"Rather nippy out, isn't it?"

The instant the words left his mouth he regretted them. Weather? Really? That's what he was going to begin a conversation with? Bloody idiot! Where was Sirius when you needed him; he was always so smooth with the ladies.

But luckily for him Tonks either didn't notice his social blunder or graciously ignored it.

"It's quite brisk, yes. Unseasonably so, really. Can't much stand the winter months, myself. One year at Hogwarts, Althea Kattalakis dared me to jump into the lake. It was bloody freezing, I tell you. Caught a cold and spent the rest of the day in the hospital wing. Probably would have drowned had the giant squid not rescued me." She chuckled lightly at her own folly.

"That's quite the story. Why did you take the dare if you couldn't swim?" Remus shook his head in mild disapproval.

"Well, she was a Slytherin, and there was a whole pack of them by the water all convinced I was too afraid to do it. Well, being bold was never a problem of mine, so I did it." She shrugged then laughed. "The look on their faces when I actually jumped was worth it though."

"I'm just glad you're still alive."

"I don't feel much alive at the moment. I hate that we got stuck with this lousy job. Next time I'll leave the drawing of lots to someone with more luck," she huffed, rubbing her hands together for warmth.

Seeing this gesture, Remus felt the near irresistible urge to take her hands in his (on the pretense of warming them up to be sure). He quickly buried such a silly notion. What was he thinking? He averted his face as a blush had unintentionally crept into his cheeks.

"Alright there, Remus? Your face is all flushed." She asked innocently enough.

"Just the cold," he muttered quickly, relieved to have such a believable excuse for his blush. "Well, I don't have much luck either, I suppose. What a fine pair we make."

A quizzical tilt to her head, Tonks opened her mouth as if to ask a question then quickly closed it as if thinking better of it. Remus studied her curiously but let the matter drop. He could guess what the question would have been and what held her back.

"At least we aren't on guard duty in that dark corridor under that stuffy old cloak."

Remus had to admit that the cloak was of poor quality. James's…no, Harry's, is much better quality. Sometimes he caught himself thinking about James as if he were still alive. So like him as Harry was. It was nice seeing the boy again over the summer holiday, even Sirius's mood had improved upon his arrival at Grimmauld Place. It was an enjoyable break despite the arduous task of cleaning (more like waging war upon) the house.

"Urgh, I know," came Tonks's reply effectively snapping Remus out of his reverie. "Bugger, this is boring, though. I thought being in the Order would be more….I don't know: action packed! You know, dueling Death Eaters daily, recruiting the best of the best, vanquishing You-Know-Who." She said all this while gesturing grandly, pantomiming wand waving and pretending to fall down dead as she said the last phrase.

Remus smiled a tight-lipped smile at her hot-blooded remark. She certainly did remind him of someone. A certain someone who, during the First Wizarding War, was prone to take off on his flying motorbike and use errant Death Eaters for nightly target practice.

"It could be worse. You could be poor Padfoot, stuck inside that dingy old dungeon of a mansion with no one but a deranged house-elf for company. I daresay, he'd find even this dull task a welcome distraction."

Tonks laughed her bright, lyrical laugh. Just hearing that sound was enough for Remus to laugh a little of his own. It was a much smaller laugh, but hearty in comparison. He'd had very few opportunities to do so in recent memory, and he was glad to be in the presence of such a light-hearted soul, for his own was heavy as a ton of goblin-wrought silver.

"Well, I must say, Remus, you are far better company than a barmy elf."

That wasn't saying much, but he smiled at her compliment none the less. "Why thank you. It's good to know that you'd prefer my company to that of a mad, elitist elf."

They broke off into a comfortable silence after that. Tonks looked thoughtful for a few moments then said, "You know, he's quite handsome, that Padfoot, even after Azkaban."

If any statement could make every last ounce of his good humor evaporate, it was that one. Inwardly, he cursed Sirius, regretting having feeling sorry for him moments earlier. That arrogant git with his bad boy charms always got the women. Some things never change. He was the fit bloke at school, popular, clever, and Remus was forever in his shadow, even now.

He couldn't stop the uncharacteristically bitter retort or the anger from seeping into his tone as he said it, "Well, you aren't the first of his admirers. You should tell him you've fallen for him; he'll be delighted." _The vain son of a bludger_, he added in his head.

For a moment, Tonks could only blink at his response, wide-eyed and bewildered. Then suddenly her violet hair turned a furious shade of scarlet to match the color rising in her cheeks. Nostrils flared, she rounded on Remus who in turned flinched, inching back in the face of her unexpected wrath.

"I'll have you know, Remus John Lupin, that you'd know perfectly well who I've fallen for if you weren't so busy feeling sorry for yourself to notice."

Blinking like a blooming idiot, he took several moments to let that information sink in. Was she saying what he thought she was?

Of course, he'd taken a liking to the unusual witch since the moment he'd met her. She'd quite literally ran into him, having tripped over an umbrella stand and fallen straight into Remus's arms. After several minutes of stammered blushing, they'd gotten introductions out of the way. Since then they'd been together on many missions including one rather memorable one in which Tonks disguised herself as Remus's twin brother, and then an even more interesting one in which a confused barman jinxed their legs together after which they spent the better part of the day trying to disentangle themselves from the wizarding version of the popular Muggle game Twister. They'd even spent much free time together outside of Order business chatting about family and reminiscing on their respective years at Hogwarts. Tonks seemed to have had a hard time of it, being in Hufflepuff, never earning any respect, and struggling to behave herself, but she aimed high with her ambitions and ultimately achieved her dream. Remus couldn't help but admire her strength as well as envy her a touch. He'd never been afforded such a great opportunity as becoming an Auror. He was lucky to find work at all, and was less than successful at managing it after his brief stint teaching at Hogwarts.

However, despite Remus's tendency to keep others away for their own protection, Tonks seemed to grow fond of him as well. Cracking jokes to lighten him up, and even inviting him to her home for afternoon tea. Over the past year, they'd known each other, a warm friendship had developed, perhaps his first one in years.

Despite all these facts, there was too much to keep them apart. For one, she was so much younger than he; she deserved someone who could keep up with her. Moreover in these dangerous times it was smart to avoid any kind of attachment for one's own protection. And the crowning reason for their distance was Remus's lycanthropy. He didn't want her to be branded and ostracized due to her association with him.

So despite his feelings being reciprocated (which he never dared to hope they would be in the first place), he did not confess. He simply pretended to misunderstand her, feigning confusion at her statement. He then changed the subject, with little success, as they remained in stony silence for the rest of the night. A silence much colder than the weather outside.

* * *

"Someone's in a jolly good mood," Sirius eyed his friend from over the top of the latest issue of the Daily Prophet (_Dumbledore Deranged; Potter off his Rocker_), a curious twinkle in his eye.

"You're one to talk," was the brusque reply.

Remus had just entered Number 12 Grimmauld Place, slamming the door and throwing his coat down, a frown worthy of Severus Snape on his face.

After the struggle to shut the curtains over Sirius's mad mother's portrait (_Freak! Abomination! Blood Traitor!_), he'd plopped down at the table, head in his hands. Sirius, never one to miss an opportunity to turn the tables on his friend, displayed Remus-worthy indifference at his theatrics, returning to his paper in an effort to annoy him. As it failed, he'd decided to take a more comfortable direct approach.

"I'll have you know, I wasn't the one that came storming in here like Voldemort had just murdered my pet hippogriff."

Remus looked up at Sirius dubiously, "Interesting choice of words."

Sirius merely shrugged, folding the paper carefully and setting it aside. He stood to stretch then turned back to the miserable Remus, "Care for a chat over a cuppa?"

Remus, knowing that Sirius was very much like a dog with a bone when it came to not knowing every single detail of everyone's lives merely nodded in resignation.

Having magically brewed some tea in record time, he sat opposite his friend at the heavy oak dining table, looking expectant over his steaming mug. "So, spill it, Moony. I am, as ever, a sympathetic ear in which to pour all you sorrows and woes, and I would never dream of mocking said sorrows and woes."

Remus had the sudden urge to pour his scalding hot tea into that ear rather than his "sorrows and woes."

"Oh, sod off, Pads. You always take the mickey out of my when I confide in you."

Sirius huffed indignantly. "Name one time!"

Remus sighed his long suffering sigh. The same sigh Sirius was so used to hearing in school. "How about the time you teased me for months about my remedial potions lessons? Or the time you charmed one of my favorite Muggle books into a chronicle of crude jokes, or lest we forget, the occasion you told Marlene McKinnon, whom you knew good and well I had taken a fancy to, that I had Scofungulus?"

Sirius face twitched at the last account, obviously trying to bite down laughter. After a few tense minutes in which Remus glared, and Sirius made strangled noises in a valiant effort to keep for barking with laughter, the taller man frowned, screwing his face up in a look of deepest affront. "Clearly, you weren't listening, Moony. I said name _one_."

Remus sighed again, a habit he'd taken up since reuniting with Sirius then simply shook his head. It was far too much effort to remain irritated with him. There was just an air about him, an impossible to resist charm that was augmented by his devilish grin and wicked sense of humor.

"Alright, alright, I'll be good. Promise. What's troubling that prematurely graying head of yours?"

Wondering if there was ever a time when Sirius could be considered "good," he made quite the show of blowing on his tea for several minutes then taking a generous sip before beginning. By the time he spoke, Sirius looked positively ready to strangle him for information. "Well, I was out scouting with Tonks tonight…"

"I like her. Right cute, lass. If a bit….giddy. Got her heart in the right place, though."

"Well, she likes you, too," Remus replied automatically with a trace of acidity.

Sirius looked taken aback for a moment, then suddenly sly. He narrowed his eyes, a quirk to his lips. "Ah, I see. You fancy her, but she's got a little crush on me, then. That's what's got your knickers in a twist, eh? Ah well, that's always how it goes, isn't it? I just can't turn off this damnable roguish charm." He shook his head sadly as if his magnetic personality was the source of constant distress.

Remus slammed his teacup down on the table with more force than was necessary, sloshing hot tea all over it. Ignoring the spill, he said derisively, "Oh, get over yourself, you great big git. She may have said you're handsome, but she confessed that she has feelings for me!" He said the last in a constricted voice, as if the very words caused him immeasurable pain.

Taking a second to let Remus cool down as he vanished the spilt tea, Sirius carefully considered his usually even tempered friend. "And her taking a shine to you upsets you…why?"

He looked at Sirius incredulously. "That's all you have to say? I thought for sure you'd ask if she was recently Confounded."

Sirius snorted. "I may like a good laugh, but I'm not cruel. You're a fine wizard, Remus. You have to know that!" At Remus's skeptical look, Sirius adopted a knowing one of his own. "Ah, that's what this is about. You reckon you don't deserve her."

Upon not disputing Sirius's comment, the man fervently began, "Moony, come off it. You're always so down on yourself. You deserve to be happy, maybe more than any of us in fact. You're a great man, a superb wizard, and a loyal friend."

It was Remus's turn to snort in derision. "I'm a monster, Sirius. Fighting a war within and without! Long ago I resigned myself to be alone. That hasn't changed now. She deserves someone younger, healthier. Someone not afflicted."

Gritting his teeth and taking several breaths before continuing, Sirius said in a would be calm voice, "Look, Remus, you may be brilliant but sometimes you can be a bloody idiot! None of that rubbish matters to the people who care about you, and your acting like this will only hurt you both unnecessarily. These are hard times, mate. You and I know better than anyone that we have to make the best of it and the most of the time we have left. You don't want regrets when the time comes."

He could only bow his head in the face of such earnest conviction. It always surprised him when such sagacious wisdom came from the notoriously carefree and laid back Sirius Black.

"Besides," continued Sirius with an unsettlingly mischievous glint in his pale eyes, "If you don't tell Tonks how you feel, she could just get swept off her feet by a dashingly handsome bloke with glossy black hair and beguiling, grey eyes."

Remus cracked a smile for the first time since leaving Tonks's side. "You're a nutter."


End file.
